I, Arielle: My Sex Diary

I started this diary for two reasons, first being it is some sort of therapy. I need a stress reliever and I need to get rid of my shyness. Writing down my stories feels like a detoxification cure, like everything bad leaves the body, and then I feel much better. Moreover, since I have to maintain it regularly, it feels like working anyway, so I don’t feel like I’m wasting my time. If you don’t already have your own sex diary, you should. If we feel like we have nothing to say, isn’t it that we should improve your sex life so it becomes at least worth telling? That’s the idea.

The other reason comes from my frustration at reading erotica, both fact and fiction. I feel like the vast majority of them are poorly written. It’s especially saddening that real stories be purely descriptive. I almost never see one where the author describes how he or she felt, only what she did. What’s more, most stories are very short and don’t go into details. I want to set an example I hope others will follow.

My boss forced me to take at least four weeks of vacation among those I accumulated since I work there. I’m taking the last two weeks of May and the first two of June. I’ve been planning a trip around Europe for a while. I wanted to have sex in the Alps since I was a teen. The opportunity was too good; I had to ask Eric about it. At first he didn’t know what to say. I mean, it was quite sudden, and we barely know each other after all. But I succeeded at convincing him to try to free himself for at least two weeks, that would coincide with my own vacation. It took him a while and some fighting (I thought he wouldn’t succeed), but he got three weeks! So we’ll both visit Rome, Milan and Munich together! Finally, I can fulfill all my fantasies. I’ve already made a list of every place I wanted to have sex with him, and there is quite a few. I even plan on bringing back some graphic souvenirs, although you won’t have any, my dear readers. ;-P

He says he’s seen all these places already but only on short business trips. He’s never taken the time to visit them. He spends his whole life on the go. I can’t wait for him to come back so we can spend some time together. I’m getting sick of just talking to him on the phone, and even phone sex isn’t nearly as great as real sex.

I want to buy a laptop and a webcam, something I can carry around and high-quality shoot video anywhere on the push of a button, but I’m totally clueless when it comes to computers. Any suggestions? Thank you in advance.

By the way, I would like to thank my friend Melissa for helping me run this journal. Without her, there would be no journal to start with, let alone readers and such. Like the diary’s new look? That’s her too. She’s incredible with a keyboard and a mouse; I’m such a moron compared to her. She says she owes me for life after I made her a favor one evening we were drunk and watching porn movies. But that’s another story, deserving its own post. Later. I swore to her I would tell it, and then she’ll owe me for another life. Go figure.

I’ve (Melissa) recently put web counters on the page. I’m astonished that so many people read me. I mean hundreds, and only in a couple months! I’m almost embarassed. I thought no one would care, especially since there are so few comments. I do read and love your comments by the way.

I recently realized this diary is quickly turning into an erotic novel. It’s already close to 20′000 words! At this rate, it will reach 50′000 words before summer. Perhaps I should publish it by then.

Would you readers care if I posted some fiction here (clearly marked, of course) along with diaries entries? It’s up to you.

Work, work and more work. Then courses, studies, errands, whatever. I hardly have five minutes for myself. Half of these posts I typed on my PDA during courses, keyboard on my lap. I need to take a break. I know, I say that all the time and it never happens. I only manage to scavenge a few hours here and there and I spend most of them having sex. Speaking of work, I haven’t dared masturbating at the office since the latest incident and it’s killing me. I don’t think I can take it much longer. I’m seriously looking for a safe way to get off at the workplace… oh, and at the university too. But I’m scared like hell of getting caught!

Just some thoughts so you get to know me better. Besides, I feel like typing something, anything.

Today, I was sick. At least officially. My boss must have believed I was in fact I was sobering up, but left me alone. Perhaps it’s better if he doesn’t find out the truth.

I love erotica. I also love real stories of people getting off, either solo or with a partner. Reading authentic stories is far more arousing than reading fantasies. The only thing I dislike about true stories is that most of them are very short. I enjoy reading from both males and females, although stories from females are usually better written and more sensual. Too bad girls writing about their sexual experiences are being outnumbered by guys. Come on, ladies! Even a chicken like me started her own sex diary. Don’t be shy! (Look who’s talking)

I like reading about solo sex. Somehow my deviant side prefers stories from women, that I find very arousing, but also very instructive. Reading a couple good stories is worth more than reading a book. I read the books too, of course, as well as articles and everything I can find online.

I need to get off about once a week. At this point I’m starting to make wet dreams and fantasize during the day. After ten days, I’m so horny I can’t even concentrate. The bad thing about it is, I have a hard time climaxing without sex toys, so I can’t even lock myself up in the ladies’ bathroom or in a closet; I have to wait until I get back home!

Strangely, I spent two years without masturbating until I resumed less than six months ago. Studies plus work must have truly worn me out for someone as sexual as me not to think about sex any longer. Read my first story?

I need a cock so baaad! It’s been three months since last time I slept with a guy and it wasn’t all that great. I miss my previous lover, Vincent. He was fantastic. We met at the university three years ago and since the very first day we couldn’t take our hands off each other. We managed to have sex every day (night) for two whole months. He was so romantic too. Then he suddenly died of a heart attack. He was only 20, dammit, give me a break! According to the doctors, his cardiac malformation went unnoticed until his heart failed him. And I almost died of heartache, cursing destiny for weeks for taking him away from me so cruelly. I came that close to kill myself one night, walking on the edge of the roof of a fifteen stories building completely drunk, ready to jump. I just didn’t have the guts to do it. Here I am crying again like a little girl. I can only dream of finding another lover like him. I miss him so much.

I don’t know how I can fit a boyfriend into my schedule, but I need it so badly that I’ll give it a try.

Which one is best, men or sex toys? I don’t know. Perhaps the answer is men with sex toys. I have yet to experience both at the same time. Speaking of toys, I prefer vibrators by far. I dream of having a long metal rod instead of my timid silver bullet but I don’t have the nerve to walk into a sex shop and buy one.

My dearest fantasy is to travel across Europe with my dream lover. Then we would have sex in the Alps, or on top of an old castle while closed to the public. I fantasize a lot about having sex outdoors, although I never dared to do it. Yet.

I would like to watch adult movies, but I can’t find any good one. My friends simply have no taste when it comes to that. As for online reviews, not only it’s hard to find anything for us ladies, but it’s always classified by perversion! Are there straight and sweet videos for her out there? I would like your recommendations.

Am I the only shameless moaner out there? Despite evidence of the contrary, I still have the feeling of being very lonely. Whenever I receive pleasure I reach a level where I can no longer control myself, moans or whatever, and after that it looks like a tornado went through the place. I know you guys like wild moaners fainting on mind blowing orgasms but I never got used to it. I feel so ashamed of myself to lack even the rudiments of self-control. Sometimes I start crying after the act and my partner has to enlace and comfort me; ironically, it may be the part of partner sex that I prefer. I know I’m silly but that’s what I need, and that’s why self pleasure is never fulfilling in the end, no matter how good it was. In my case, sex toys cannot replace an understanding and comforting (male) partner.

I like to write. I thought about writing some fantasies but I just like authentic stories better, and I can’t tell any other than my own. There is some magic in real life sex in all its good and bad aspects that makes it different, sweet, more enjoyable than the average dirty talk erotic novel. I like to get into a person’s or character’s head when I read erotic stories and I prefer them at the first person. I fantasize a lot about what it would be like to be a man when I read a story written by one. How it would be like to have a cock, to be strong and manly, how it feels when they get inside us, how they feel when we touch them, when they please us. Strange, isn’t it? How about you?

One last thing: Is it normal, or healty, to masturbate to exhaustion most of the time like I do? Please advise.

Call me Arielle. I am a young, 22 years old woman exploring her sexuality. I work for an accounting firm while attending university part time. Nowadays, my sex life consists mostly of daring masturbation, although every once in a while I spend a wild night with a guy. I am very shy, but I am so embarassed of it that it actually drives me forward. I love reading novels, erotica, spicy food, classical music, sunbathing, driving, drinking and of course sex. I fantasize about having sex outdoors, especially at majestic heights, although my wish has yet to be fulfilled.